Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Randomize
