I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
