do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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