I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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