so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
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