My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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