I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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