Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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