I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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