wake up i wanna do it froggy style
tell your sister to shave her snatch
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
