So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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