i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize