I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
