I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
