That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
