So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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