My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He shit in the fireplace
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
