if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
