dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize