oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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