as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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