How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
