Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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