my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
wow bdsm is so cute
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
