Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
