he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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