I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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