IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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