we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I want to fling myself into the sun
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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