so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize