As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
