LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
His nipple licking is glorious
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