I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
