stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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