dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
