You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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