i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
