I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
did i just pee glitter
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
