That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
