you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
