He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
