Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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