Are we in a gay sports bar?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
