So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize