Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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