i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
