At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
