Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Randomize
