after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
