I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
